WHO NOT TO BE
From early on, I had plans. First, survive adolescence by escaping the grips of my narcissistic, alcoholic mother. Second, form an identity that convinces the world that, unlike her, I was “normal” enough to be worthy of credibility.
Christina’s Social Norms Playbook (ca. 1995): Emulate the families you see on TV, become educated, be attractive (but not too attractive), get that all-American guy to fall in love with you AND marry you, have kids, a steady job, a house in the suburbs… DON’T BECOME YOUR MOM.
(Check, check, check, check,CHECK. Hey world, am I normal yet?)
While trying to escape the perceived shame of our parents’ faults, we can condition ourselves to strive for a life of who not to be. Misguided, we don’t even realize that we put not becoming our parents ahead of self-fulfillment.
Time to change plans.
A COMPLICATED HOLIDAY – THE IMPORTANCE OF SUPPORTING WOMEN WHO GRIEVE ON MOTHER’S DAY
The stats are in, moms had it rough last year. With so many either out of work, forced to take a cut in hours, or strapped with the impossible task of remote work while educating home-schooled kids, Mother’s Day 2021 has been well earned. But this year and every year, let’s also take a moment…
IN PURSUIT OF COMMONALITY – RECONCILING WITH MY FATHER
The strangeness of being raised by a family that doesn’t look like you comes and goes over time. But the racial inequities that exploded to the surface in 2020 birthed a reckoning, and this reckoning made me yearn for commonality more than ever before. I was reeling from an election season that exposed unfathomable bigotry.…
WHO DO YOU LOOK LIKE?
I will always remember the bright Florida day that my best friend and I decided to spread out a blanket to hang out and read our new teeny-bopper magazines. We were still middle school preteens, and we especially loved the quizzes that would answer our burning questions about grown-up things like crushes and makeup. Now,…
BelievableShe 